Faded Boxers

Though it’s been almost a week since I saw Batman Begins, it has taken me this long to post my thoughts on it because I honestly could not make up my mind about it. Based on how well made the movie is, I know I’m supposed to like it, but unfortunately it doesn’t do anything for me. I felt like a freak inside the movie theater. I looked around and saw that everyone, including Rach, was buying into the whole thing and I was feeling left out.

I wouldn’t be feeling this way if there was anything significantly wrong with the movie. Had this movie been anything like Batman & Robin, even without the rubber nipples, I would have felt secure with the knowledge that I was right and everybody else was wrong. But given the fact that this movie got most things right, I wasn’t so sure when I left the theater.

Aside from the fact that all the action sequences were total bullshit (That’s right, I said it. Chris Nolan can’t direct action scenes for shit!) , there really isn’t anything wrong with the movie. Christian Bale is quite possibly the best Batman to date, while Nolan & co. have succeeded in capturing the real essence of Batman where others have failed before.

Tim Burton, great director that he is, made two mistakes when he made Batman and Batman Returns: he forgot that the story had to be about Batman, and he made Batman relatively normal. In both movies, most of the character development and exposition were dedicated to Batman’s villains instead of Batman himself; thereby practically relegating him to a peripheral role. Burton’s second mistake was he made Batman relatively normal which totally missed the point as far as Batman is concerned.

People don’t love Batman because of his “wonderful toys,” (Ok, so maybe we do) people don’t love him because he is probably the smartest superhero there is, people don’t love him because he is a total badass, and people don’t love him because he’s rich. People may like him for the reasons mentioned above, but they don’t love him for it. No. The real reason people love him is because he is totally, clinically, bat-shit fucking insane. This enabled him to do everything we wanted to, but were afraid to do. This made him larger than life. Also, this made him wear his underwear outside.

Going back to the movie: Christian Bale not only owned the role, but has quite possibly robbed every other other actor—past, present, and future—the right to ever play the role. He is a badass of the badasses with a generous helping of badassness. Of course, anything less would have been unacceptable for someone who made American Psycho work. Nolan for his part, recognized the need to give the character the attention it deserves and works his way from there to astonishing results. The same level of excellence, if not a respectable helping of competence, can be seen all around. Liam Neeson, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, Gary Oldman, and Cillian Murphy were all pitch perfect. And while Katie Holmes gives probably the weakest performance in the film, it’s not so bad that it mars the impact of the picture.

This is the Batman film that fans have been waiting for. Everything has been constructed to measure up to their expectations of how the Dark Knight’s story should develop. Christopher Nolan was able to deliver a movie that any fan would salivate over.

Strangely enough, I think it is this success that is the cause of my disquiet. It’s as if everything has been laid out for Christopher Nolan and writer David Goyer in such a way that it’s impossible for them to fail.

All the other Batman films that have gone before have failed in one way or another. Like I said earlier, Tim Burton didn’t think that the character of Batman was interesting enough to warrant his full attention. And Joel Schumacher is, well, probably the gayest filmmaker ever. Understandably, there was a lot of pressure on Nolan not to fuck up. If I were him, I’d realize that the easiest solution is simply not repeat all the previous mistakes and stick as close to the source material as possible; in this case Frank Miller’s Batman: Year One. Heck, even the design of the Batmobile was inspired by the one in Batman: The Dark Knight Returns.

And that is probably the reason why I just can’t bring myself to buy into the whole thing: Christopher Nolan didn’t take any chances. He may have taken some liberties with the Batman myth, but he did not take any chances. For all of the daring decisions Nolan made with this picture, considering what has gone before, they were all very safe.

Not that I don’t appreciate the movie. Like I said before, it is relatively well-made, and is downright awesome. I’m pretty sure I’ll end up watching it as many times as it is humanly possible without getting sick of those bullshit action sequences (sorry, I just can’t forgive Nolan for that). I’ll even recommend it to a a friend or two, but just not with the same level of enthusiasm as that of everybody else.