Support Group

The past few months has been hell for me. Apparently, living with Psoriasis is harder than I first thought. I was misled (by myself it would seem) into thinking that all I had to deal with were a few lesions here and there, and a bad case of dandruff. Now, despite all my efforts to the contrary, this disease has managed to invade all aspects of my life, leaving me with no choice but to learn to live with this debilitating illness.

Before anything, I would like to expound upon what I’ve discussed in my initial post on Psoriasis and add a few things that bare mentioning:

• Psoriasis is an ugly, petty disease that has kept doctors and scientists baffled over its causes and cure.
• Its main symptom is the presence of large scaly patches all over the skin of the afflicted (me).
• Other symptoms include the onset of psoriatic arthritis which has the ability of immobilizing the afflicted’s limbs, even to the extent of deforming them.
• While nobody is sure about the cause of Psoriasis, the most widely accepted theory is that the immune system is wrongly informed into thinking that the body has just suffered from external trauma and is need of a new layer of skin.
• The immune system of a person afflicted with Psoriasis will keep on producing new layers of skin at an accelerated rate, which would result in the itchy scales that appear throughout the psoriatic’s skin.
• It has been estimated that the average psoriatic produces skin 10 times faster than a normal person.
• Psoriasis is not contagious, nor can it be transferred through sexual encounters. The only way to pass it on is if I give birth to you.
• Anybody can have Psoriasis. Even those without psoriatics in the family.
• Caucasians are more likely to contract Psoriasis than Asians. Statistics show that more than 5 million Americans have Psoriasis. In the Philippines, as much as 2% of the population have it, making that about 170,000 Filipinos afflicted with Psoriasis.
• Factors such as stress, physical trauma, certain foods, and cold weather can trigger or aggravate psoriasis.
• At present, there is no known cure for Psoriasis, and once you’ve been diagnosed as having it, it is with you for the rest of your life.

Pretty heavy ain’t it? Wait, there’s more. The above is just a list of facts and figures I’ve gathered since my diagnosis. Below is a list of realities I have to live with, and are not found in any medical literature that I’ve encountered:

• At the moment, 70% of my body is covered with bloody, itchy, hardened scales that make movement not only difficult, but extremely painful.
• You will always know if I’ve been in the room because I always leave behind a path of skin flakes in my wake.
• Whenever I stretch, one way or another, I’d feel my skin crack. That’s because my scales, which are not elastic like normal skin, break from the tension, causing blood to ooze from the wounds.
• Whenever I wake up, I find blood stains on my bedsheets and pillows.
• I cannot wear white because it will always end up with red spots by the end of the day.
• I can never use my computer/laptop without leaving behind bloody fingerprints.
• Because of my psoriatic arthritis, two of my fingers in my left hand as well as my right ankle are immobilized unless I take my medication.
• Taking a bath is torture for me since the water burns my fresh wounds.
• I am now addicted to painkillers and antihistamines. Without them, I cannot funcion properly on a daily basis.
• While most psoriatics can simply rely on various topical creams to treat their condition, my psoriatic arthritis gives me no choice but to take pills which has the unfortunate side effect of potentially damaging my liver.
• I have lost the desire to blog regularly.

I attended my first support group meeting last Saturday. On the way to the meeting, I was expecting to see a lot of reptiles—a sight that would make me feel most welcome. Imagine my surprise when all I saw were a lot of clear-skinned people eager to welcome anybody who wishes to join their group.

Instead of feeling like the ugliest person there on account of my scales, all I felt was hope. Because seeing my support group, made up of beautiful people from all walks of life, I was encouraged that maybe someday I can once again be mistaken for a normal person.